"That bitch tried to drop me with a chair. Bro remember WWF?? Just like that."
-Degenerate
Most days start with a solid sigh. "What might this lovely community bring me today?" I thought. As my career progressed my days always had this thought: "Where are the mutant rats from the sewers to make this day more memorable?". As if this town needed more excitement, but I believe that is what they refer to as "Jaded". I do not think I was, but when you run enough 911s in a busy enough city; you feel like you have seen it all. The mutant rats wouldv'e been all I was missing to confirm that last statment. Or so I thought...
You know that one motel in your city? The one that YOU know not to go to, but it is always busy? Well that motel is festering with drugs, homeless, and hookers. Lol, really. My partner and I just cleared a call and successfully obtained a "against medical advice". Who knew that when you sneezed hard enough you might see stars...? (sarcasm). With our next Post in mind (those couches were bae), we start heading to our west side Post. Except, we needed to travel through that one part of town. You all know that one part of town... The one that you start the prayer "Though I walk through the valley of death..." only to be grabbed by that very motel on a "stage".
We were cleared into the call. The only thing we had in the notes stated a male subject was assaulted, which couldv'e meant anything. We pull into the parking lot and were greeted by that look that law enforcement likes to give. The one that says it all, "This shit is dumb." Fortunately, I find different things entertaining, and this one was just that.
Law enforcement had this guy seated inside while they dealt with his contender. She was fierce. At least a whole hundred or so pounds and standing tall at just under Five foot... I'm sure her name was sparkle or something. But let me tell you, the city I worked in wasn't for any soft street-walkers. You could tell she has been on these streets for a few years. So when this guy tried to force his way with this little lady, she shut him down. Not only did she shut him down, she knocked his ass out! With the same metal folding chair you used to use in the WWF video games. She then called 911, and was nice enough to say "I'm not sure what happened to my friend. I think he fell." However, myself and law enforcement weren't that dumb. She tried to hide the bloodied folding chair in the small bushes outside of the window as if we wouldn't see it. But! Her story was safe with him because of shame I'm sure. Nonetheless, this was one of those "Huh, I thought I've seen it all." It definitely wasn't the last time we ran a call that made me chuckle.
